just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
