Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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