there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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