I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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