Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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