make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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