I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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