you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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