The maid of honor just puked.
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize