I hate all girls vehemently.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
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