I'm going to jail i love you
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
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