yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
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