I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
