i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize