If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
We're too hungover to prance.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
