Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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