She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Randomize
