I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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