I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
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Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
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Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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