Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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