I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
