"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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