I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize