Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize