did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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