D3 body, D1 cock
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I love having hate sex.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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