Dual....:-)
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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