Texts From Last Night

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  (425): View more from Washington

  Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.

  (425): View more from Washington

  'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas

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  (425): Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor. (425): 'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas http://tfl.nu/4u1g
  Replies (9) Good night (1974) Bad night (582)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?

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  (773): I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex. (773): Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"? http://tfl.nu/bxnr
  Replies (15) Good night (852) Bad night (2153)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks

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  (908): We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks http://tfl.nu/lwab
  Replies (10) Good night (4288) Bad night (1565)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.

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  (651): drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then. http://tfl.nu/hp3p
  Replies (17) Good night (2963) Bad night (810)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.

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  (919): You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume. http://tfl.nu/gckc
  Replies (46) Good night (13351) Bad night (1023)
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  (530): View more from California

  Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.

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  (530): Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls. http://tfl.nu/qy86
  Replies (27) Good night (825) Bad night (7318)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate

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  (512): I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate http://tfl.nu/79c0
  Replies (7) Good night (3340) Bad night (976)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore

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  (480): its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore http://tfl.nu/mq1v
  Replies (7) Good night (916) Bad night (2167)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.

  (434): View more from Virginia

  Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.

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  (240): Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird. (434): Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls. http://tfl.nu/td3o
  Replies (12) Good night (3497) Bad night (808)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.

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  (603): the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me. http://tfl.nu/iz0f
  Replies (8) Good night (1908) Bad night (690)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...

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  (617): Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed... http://tfl.nu/fkp9
  Replies (7) Good night (1426) Bad night (691)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.

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  (647): I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes. http://tfl.nu/g99k
  Replies (4) Good night (345) Bad night (824)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?

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  (317): Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning? http://tfl.nu/7de2
  Replies (0) Good night (551) Bad night (356)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"

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  (732): oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer" http://tfl.nu/l0xj
  Replies (2) Good night (599) Bad night (245)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick

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  (571): We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick http://tfl.nu/pb28
  Replies (2) Good night (454) Bad night (186)

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