That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
