I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
