I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
