Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
