On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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