if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize