Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
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