feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
