i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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