All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
