just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
