He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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