did you get engaged???
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
her facebook's as public as her vagina
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
