They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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