maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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