i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
