no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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