just tell him i said nine months
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize