have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
