ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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