i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
