haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
i just made my gag reflex go away.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
